This is (Actually) Happening: June 2018

You know what happened?

I turned 45 years old.

Yup. Middle age.

No way around it.

No way behind it or in front of it or below it.

Can’t go over it, can’t go under it. Just gotta be it!

And what better way to start this year (my 46th – geez) than by saying hello to all of you.

And telling you what I’ve been into and some ideas of what you can check out and what you need to tell me about. There are always books to read, music to hear, shows to watch and places to visit. Do these things and report back. Thanks so much!

Ahhh but there’s one more thing. I need to remind you.

There’s that other thing that started this newsletter all those years ago (it’s coming up on 5 years ago).

The most important thing!

It’s me telling you that you are awesome and what you are the most awesome at is being you.

Keep being you.

No one else can do it.

Outside of this newsletter as I’ve actually lived my life over the past 5 years, what has struck me the most about my growth and my learning about people is authenticity.  Straight-up being authentic.

Find you in there.

I’ve learned that this can be the number one way to get thru a day. Be Authentic.

Was I myself? Did I act how I would genuinely like to act?

Now, please do not read this the wrong way. I am only as authentic as I can be.

And like all people, I am not perfect. Some days you are more true to yourself than other days. Some weeks you’ve got it going on and some weeks you can’t quite get there. Maybe you say something you didn’t mean to say or you didn’t respond to a friend representing your best self or with your best response. I think authenticity is realizing that. Realizing you will sometimes make mistakes and realizing you have to be okay with that.

Authenticity is something you can strive for and it can help you thrive.

So, some things that felt genuine to me. They genuinely make me feel joy, and laughter and they make me feel productive and grateful and thankful for being here. Truly here and present. That’s being authentic, isn’t it?

Being present. I hope you can be present today and in all your future days.

Dumbest Job Ever: MOM

Did you notice that This is Happening has basically been out of your inbox since Donald Trump has been President?
He’s 45 and I’m 45 so clearly there’s a connection.
But I’m not going to go there. We are not connected him and I. We are disconnected.
Actually I was feeling very un-connected to all things a few months ago. It was a low point.
I was playing tennis very unmoored and ahem, not well, one morning. I realized I wasn’t just feeling un-connected to tennis. I was feeling unconnected to my family. To my friends. To my body. To my path.
When I realized I was at this low point, I immediately saw that I needed to make a mental change and to, bottom line, change that perspective. I needed to realize I AM connected to all these things and rather easily. A phone call. An afternoon around the house just being together. No plan but just being.
Some things in the recent past that have made me feel more connected and less unmoored from myself, and my loved ones:
1. Daybreaker  – I’ve attended a total of about 5 of these early morning dance parties. Won’t you join me sometime soon?
2. The Lodge at Woodloch – Look this isn’t some kind of innovative new thing I am going to tell you about. It’s a spa. You go alone. Well, without your kids but with friends. And you sit in the steam room, you take yoga classes. You read. You als visit the whisper room where you only whisper. Or read or nap. But that’s it. And guess what. You will feel moored. You will feel grounded. You will feel a way you want to feel.
3. You know else what helps –  – a cup of tea.
A fucking cup of tea!!


May was Mental Health Awareness month. Were you aware of that? In case you weren’t, here on June 1 is some stuff to ponder.

Were you aware of the stigma associated with Mental Health Illness?

I always thought I was but then I started to read some more and I quickly realized I was only semi-aware. I am going to try my best to stay aware and help others as well. There is a serious stigma attached to mental health that I initially thought was simple and on the surface. It’s not. It’s deep. The stigma is deep and I believe we should all learn some more so we can erase that stigma as soon as possible.

A terrific resource to find articles relating to Mental Health is NAMI is the National Alliance of Mental Illness. You can take a quick quiz at It’s a good starting point.

Approximately 1 in 5 adults in the U.S.—43.8 million, or 18.5%—experiences mental illness in a given year (from so we can confidently state that all of us have all been touched in some way by this stigmatized illness. It’s up to us to change this stigma!

Netflix and Recommend

When I catch good, thoughtful, & meaningful (even if its meaning is only to make you laugh and nothing else) entertainment all I want to do is tell people about it!

I’m telling you here and now:

Love, Netflix

Ryan Hamilton, Netflix

Westworld, HBO (old school)

I’ve got to tackle The Handmaid’s Tale. I read the book about 6 months ago so it’s time. I need to see Peggy Olsen take on Mike Pence!

Ahem, that is, I need to see Elizabeth Moss in this award wining show.

Borrow Beg and Steal to make sure you read these books soon! 

The Female Persuasion

I think after reading this piece by Lena Dunham you will agree that you need to march yourself to a library or book store and dig in. Now some people I’ve recommended it to didn’t finish it but I don’t remember exactly which of my friends that is so, we can in fact, continue to be friends.

Lilac Girls

Nazis and Connectucut country homes and Concentration Camps and New York City socialites. No this book isn’t for the faint of heart but you will be stronger after you read it. I promise.

So – go get yourself a cup of tea.
It will in fact, feel good.

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